Allie’s Academie Journal, Day 4: Bluebird

This Christina Perri song, Bluebird, just keeps running through my head. Just snippets of it, over and over…

How the hell does a broken heart

Get back together when it’s torn apart?

Teach itself to start beating again…

The rest of the song really has nothing to do with what’s going on in my life, but that part does. And it’s like the song knows, because it keeps running over and over and over again.

Three years till I’m out of here. Three years. I can hardly comprehend how long that is when I think about being locked in this tiny space for all that time.

Four years till I see him again. It took me that long to get through hell school–I mean high school (oops!), and that seemed like forever.

And all I keep thinking is: what might life had been like if I could have my freedom and have Bryan too. But that’s impossible. If there were no Academie, there would be no Bryan in my life. Why does life always have to be like this? Can’t things ever go nice and easy? A perfect little fairy tale where I get to live happily ever after at the end? A peaceful life, without all the crazy chaos that is real life?

Sounds like it’s time for me to head to bed. Apparently, I’m already dreaming.